TO THE ROOF!

This week Fiancé and I discovered the joys of furniture assembly and arrangement as a couple. There was a whole lot of “No, really, the couch should go here,” followed by “Oh my god, you were so right, this is all wrong, let’s put it back the way it was,” and then “That looks awful, doesn’t it? Maybe we should just put it all on the roof and call it a day?”

The biggest issue is that we live in 200-year-old tiny farm house with tiny rooms and crooked walls and we bought a bunch of modern-sized furniture from Ikea that doesn’t fit in said tiny farm house with tiny rooms and crooked walls. Plus, we have double the amount of stuff now that we’re living together. So, I’m suggesting we put stuff on the roof.

Fiancé: You mean the attic?

Me: What? No! It’s haunted up there. I mean the roof.

Fiancé: Why?

Me: Because we have too much furniture right now.

Fiancé: So you want to put it on the roof?

Me: Yes.

Fiancé: How are you going to get to the roof?

Me: A ladder. Or magic?

Fiancé: What furniture is going up there?

Me: At least some chairs. We have too many chairs.

Fiancé: Oh, like the designer chair you got from your sister?

Me: NO! I love that chair!

Fiancé: I have a feeling that you just mean my furniture.

Me: You said it, not me.

Fiancé: I think we can put the shoe trunk on the roof. I hate that thing. It’s dangerous, it smells weird, and it’s impossible to find any of our shoes in there.

Me: I agree. That furniture plan did not work out. It’s going on the roof.

Fiancé: Great. Except… It has all of our shoes in it. I don’t want to go up on the roof without any shoes.

Me: TOO BAD IT’S ALREADY DECIDED I’M GETTING THE LADDER!

Cohabitation is going really well, you guys.

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In other news, I wrote a piece about Book Guilt and it’s over on Books, Ink’s Hamlet Hub. Go check it out, but only if you want to!

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