The art of taking care of yourself is an art I have not-at-all mastered.

The other day I was sitting around reading the paper and drinking my coffee (like a real live adult!!) when I got bored and decided to text my best friend, John Hamm (not her real name (also not the actor), because privacy and whatever).

Me: The obituaries are boring today.

JH: I’m sorry no one interesting has died.

Me: Actually, this one guy was a cartoonist for disney and served in the Canadian Navy… So maybe I spoke too soon…

Me: And it’s not that the people weren’t interesting, it’s their obituaries that aren’t interesting.

Me: When I die, please write an awesome obituary for me.

JH: Why do you assume you’re going to die before me?

Me: Let’s be real.

JH: I smoke and I am in a high stress field. I am going first.

JH: My blood veins are going to look like linguini from stress shredding them.

Me: Yeah, but I’ve sustained three injuries this morning alone.

JH: Oh god, what did you do?

Me: I sliced my hand on the cheese grater while doing dishes.

Me: I tripped over the phone cord and smacked my knee.

Me: And I almost slipped outside and could have cracked my head open.

JH: Living alone is such a good choice for you.

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3 Responses to The art of taking care of yourself is an art I have not-at-all mastered.

  1. Kelly Mintz says:

    I so look forward to reading your blogs! You are funny, witty, real & make me laugh! Thank you!!!

  2. Jessica says:

    I may have you beat. I injured myself five times (not counting countless ordinary elbow bashings and shin slams) while moving the other day. I manage to slam the knuckles on both hands into the doorframe simultaneously, hit my butt really hard on the stair rail, set the couch on my foot, had the door slam shut in a way that the doorknob hit me right in the side, and punched the couch. But at least I have roommates if anything goes terribly wrong. I’m glad you didn’t crack your head open though. Your blog posts are so real yet funny.

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