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- While I Have Your Attention, Overlords….
- Congratulations: You Make Me Sick.
- Maybe it’s not me, after all… maybe it’s just my face!
- Oh, you know, just a normal day in my pants. OH WAIT NO.
- I feel like we’re doing the whole “romantic sunset” thing wrong.
- Not a real post, but a great reminder!
- Seven things I’m thankful for (and NONE OF THEM ARE BRENDA)
- I’ll probably only be happy if I’m naked and living in the forest at this point: A rant.
- It’s official: I’m becoming my father.
- Ten minutes.
- emeliesamuelsonFiverrSellerI primarily write humor essays and blog posts, as well as press releases and social media content for businesses and events. I am the creator and operator of the blog "Awkwardly Alive and Pleasantly Peculiar," and my work has appeared on The Feminine Collective, HelloGiggles, Catalyst Wedding Co., and in the anthology, This One Has No Name by The No Name Writing Group.
Tag Archives: humor
Last night I took Gio out to go to the bathroom, but it was really dark and I got scared, so I only let him pee, which makes me a terrible dog owner, but in my defense I took him inside so that I … Continue reading
Well hello there, friends! I’m sorry for my bloggy absence this past weekend, but activities took over and my brain couldn’t handle putting words out by the end of it all. Sometimes we all need a little, unplanned break, don’t … Continue reading
So something has been bothering me ALL DANG WEEK. Someone asked me for “a scissor.” As I handed the scissors to them I thought to myself, “Don’t you mean ‘a pair of scissors?’” And then…. I spiraled. via GIPHY Because … Continue reading
Okay, so the last time I wrote about the gym, we all learned about my obsession with this guy at our gym who looks exactly like Drake. I was pretty excited to go back to the gym tonight, not because I … Continue reading
My Bestbian is on her way to visit me from Boston RIGHT NOW and I am beyond excited because I haven’t seen her since my wedding day (which was sadly the day I married someone other than her. Damn you, sexuality!) … Continue reading
….WHAT IS HAPPENING?!?! In equally unsettling news, #SundaySupdates, a live Q&A I do WHILST COOKING, is live and public this Sunday at 8pm! Most Sundays it’s just for the Patreon people, but the last Sunday of every month, I open it up … Continue reading
I am obsessed with a guy at my gym. Not in like a creepy sexual way, but in just a fascination way, because he looks exactly like Drake. via GIPHY And I’m pretty sure his name is Jake. At … Continue reading
When The Mr picked me up from work today, I was just getting to the climax of my book, and I did NOT want to put it down, so I was naturally a little cranky about going to the gym. … Continue reading
Gio had to go to the vet yesterday for his first ever teeth cleaning. I don’t normally have any anxiety over dentistry, but for him it felt different. They had to put him under, which surprised me at first, but then made … Continue reading