Reflections on Romance… WITH KNIVES!

I think you can tell a lot about a couple from the way they shop for stuff in their home. You learn about who is practical and who is…not.

I am very concerned with things looking cute.

Fiance is very concerned with things working properly and looking nice.

This is most evident in our selection of kitchen equipment. If there are faces on it, or cute animals involved (as long as they’re not the meal itself), I am totally on board. Fun colors?! Count me in! In fact, before Fiance moved in with all of his fancy, functional stuff, almost everything in my home was brightly colored and had silly faces. My spatulas look like pigs. My knives are alarmingly bright. Fiance’s are all dull and silver. Well, they’re actually not dull at all. His knives are frighteningly sharp, but you know what I mean. They don’t make you feel all warm and fuzzy inside, which I guess is a good thing if we were to be robbed. The last thing you want is for someone to break into your home and then you pull a knife out to defend yourself and the intruder is all “Aw, well that’s just adorable.” Then again, maybe you do. Maybe this is how we can find peace in the world. Through cute knives.

Fiance? He’s all “Well, sure, the knives do all look like cartoon farm animals, but do they cut stuff?”

WHO CARES, FIANCE! LOOK AT HOW HAPPY THEY ARE! They double as knives AND PUPPETS!

And that’s how I get things taken away from me and quietly escorted out of stores…

 

So yes, I think you can tell a lot about a couple from the way they shop for stuff in their home, but I think what’s even more interesting is that the Fiance and I are completely inverted when it comes to our selection in romantic partners. After all, I picked the practical one, and he picked the cartoon character with googley eyes…

And we’re both equally dangerous.

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2 Responses to Reflections on Romance… WITH KNIVES!

  1. John Hamm says:

    This feels eerily similar to the time you decided to buy an Elmo sandwich case when you had, like, ten dollars to your name.

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