Monthly Archives: September 2013

Do You Guys Think There Are Gardening Gangs? I Think There Are Gardening Gangs.

Happy Monday, Duckies!! So…. I have news. I’m moving!! I’m leaving Suburbia, Ohio and heading off to “Stars Hollow” in Connecticut to fulfill my dream of becoming a Gilmore Girl! Now the only thing holding me back is that I … Continue reading

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“Some Poor Guy Hoping to Learn More About Sales Techniques Ended Up Worrying About the Blood Flow to His Extremities.”

Okay, so this isn’t a real post, duckies, because my family arrived this morning from New York and I have to be at work in an hour. So… in lieu of my infinite wit and wisdom, I give you Tim … Continue reading

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What Happens When We Talk About Boys.

Okay, so last night, my good friend Lemon and I were sitting at the bar having a drink when we spotted this mega attractive guy at the table behind us. Naturally, we went into creepy mode and started trying to … Continue reading

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Someone Get Me My Prince and Mice. I Should Be On My Way to a Ball.

So, on weekends I work as a hostess and a really swanky wine bar/restaurant. I like this job because it involves wine it’s a chance for me to look really nice every Saturday night, plus the people I work with give … Continue reading

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The Guy Was Probably Just Impressed with/Jealous of My Old Lady Impression.

Good morning, Duckies!! So yesterday at work, I had a very strange series of conversations… Phone rings Me: Thank you for calling The Book Shop! This is Emelie. Older Woman: Yes, Hi! Is Michael there? Me: Oh, I’m sorry. He doesn’t work here … Continue reading

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Help Me, Duckies. You’re My Only Hope.

Okay, so Lisa Newlin has convinced me given me permission to audition for Blogger Idol. So now I need your help. Which post should I audition with? I’ve narrowed it down to these four: Why Bachelorette Parties Should Never Happen On … Continue reading

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Think of This as Your Thank You Card, Because I Don’t Have Your Addresses.

Okay, so to all of you who commented on my last post: Thank you.  You are all so supportive and amazing. Like… in a mind-blowing way. The comments, texts, and various emails that I got were overwhelming and made me realize … Continue reading

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“And We Are Just Breakable Girls and Boys”

I’ve posted various vague posts on Facebook about this, and today, I posted a rather blunt one in a blogging group that I’m a part of: First of all… Thank you to everyone who responded. Every single comment (and there … Continue reading

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Apparently I Can Eat A Lot… Including the Dead.

So… I’m a nerd. WHAAAAAT? I know. Shocking, what with all the times that I’ve told  you to watch Battlestar Galactica and Doctor Who… or made you vote on which Harry Potter phone case I should buy… you never saw … Continue reading

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What Do You Mean My Life Isn’t a Sit-Com?

So, I might have a problem… As many of you know, my best friend, John Hamm, has moved away to Boston (excuse me while I go bawl my eyes out in to a glass of wine at 10:00 a.m.). Obviously, … Continue reading

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