My friends think quite highly of me. Obviously.

A conversation I just had with a friend who we will call “Turtles McGee”:

Me: Is it weird if I go see Rosewater by myself?

Turtles McGee: I think that’d be pretty cool.

Me: Except my theater isn’t playing it. :(

Turtles McGee: Well…it’d be weird to sit in the movie theatre alone pretending you’re watching Rosewater.

Me: Um… that would be awesome. Let’s be real. You know you would want to know more about that person.

Turtles McGee: I’d want to know what they thought of Rosewater…. and yeah, I’d probably get a cup of coffee with them.

Me: I’m just picturing myself sitting in an empty theater, staring at the blank screen for 2 hours and going through a wide range of emotions while eating popcorn.

Turtles McGee: That…actually sounds pretty standard for you.

***

In other news… there’s a new Page Break episode. Watch it here:

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NaNoWriMo Begins!

I’ve attempted NaNoWriMo in the past and failed. Maybe failed is the harsh term, but either way, I’ve never actually completed a novel. I’ve been working on the same book for the past few years on and off and I’m so ready to complete it. I don’t want to be done with it in the sense that I want to wash my hands of it or anything, but I’m sick of listening to myself make excuses, so I’ve decided to do NaNoWriMo a little differently this year.

Instead of taking the 30 days to write a 50,000-word novel from start to finish, I’m going to start at word 17, 787 and go from there. I’m going to use NaNoWriMo to freaking finish my novel. It’s time to take all those notes and scraps of paper and post-its and actually apply them here and get this shit done.

It’s going to be tough. I know that. I’m not one of those writers who just bleeds words and PRESTO!: There’s a novel.

No.

I’m one of those writers who whines and cries and bangs her head against the desk and constantly texts her friends saying “I can’t do this.”

That’s the kind of writer I am.

But dammit, sometimes I even text myself back and say “YES YOU CAN! YOU’VE GOT THIS!” and then sad-me responds with “STOP TOYING WITH MY EMOTIONS AND JUST LET THIS DREAM DIE!!” and then the cool-me says “NO! KEEP GOING!” and it goes on like that for a while.

What’s my point again? Oh yeah, I’m determined to finish my novel this month and I’m using NaNoWriMo (albeit in an unconventional way, but still) to do it and I hope you’re all okay with that.

And if you aren’t, well then I’ll enjoy being a rebel in your eyes.

Are you doing NaNoWriMo? If so, leave a comment below with your NaNo name and I’ll buddy you!

Happy writing, all!

***

In other news, here’s the new Page Break episode, in which Cole does a book review of the new Garth Nix novel (yay!!) Clariel:

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My dog is kind of great at taking selfies.

Okay, so if you follow me on Instagram, you know that I have a weirdly photogenic dog. I don’t know how he does it, but he freaking knows that when the phone is pointed at him, it’s time to look fabulous. But the weirder part is that he kicks ass in the selfie department. Seriously, everyone, he has figured out the best angle and lighting for his face like no millenial ever could.

Screen Shot 2014-10-28 at 7.16.37 AM

“Road trip! Yaaaay!”

Girl, you are way to excited about this snow. I can't even.

“Girl, you are way to excited about this snow. I can’t even.”

"No, no, you just have to open your mouth a little bit and smile and it will look like a candid laughter pic. Like this!"

“No, no, you just have to open your mouth a little bit and smile and it will look like a candid laughter pic. Like this!”

And it’s not just me, you guys. He does it for John Hamm on her birthday, too:

gioleah

So fresh. So pro.

In other news…

There was a new Page Break episode, in which Cole and I suggest some pretty great Halloween reads.

Also: WE CAN NOW GO TO LONDON AND STAY IN A HARRY POTTER HOTEL AND OH MY GOSH I MUST GO NOW.

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How to Do Online Dating the Wrong Way.

So today I’m on HelloGiggles.com with a piece about how NOT to do Online Dating:

“Before I started online dating, I was really losing hope that I would ever find someone. As a 23 year old, it was ridiculous to feel that way, but I’d just gotten out of a relationship with a guy who I thought was The One and heartache makes you crazy. Shortly thereafter, but for unrelated reasons, I moved three states away to a small town where the median age is over twice my own. A friend of mine suggested I turn to the Internet. “Why not?” He said, “Everything’s online now; it only makes sense that our generation would do dating that way, too, right?”

He made a fair point.

So, I signed up. That white rabbit ran by, I followed, and boy did I fall down a long, strange and confusing hole…”

Read the full article here!!

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Three-Year-Olds are basically geniuses. I think that’s the point here.

Hello, duckies!

Sorry I disappeared last week. Sometimes it’s nice to just take a vacation from the internet once in a while, you know?

 

Anyway, today is my nephew’s third birthday and when I asked him what he wanted to do, this is the response I got:

Nephew: I want to eat pizza and cake!

Me: Good. Your priorities are so in the right place, buddy. I like the way you think.

Nephew: Yeah! Pizza and cake with Mormor and Morfar!*

Me: Oh man… Now we’re talkin’! Mormor and Morfar? Pizza and cake? This sounds like the perfect celebration! What are you going to have on your pizza?

Nephew: ……. Cake!!

Me: ……. You’re a friggin’ genius, dude.

*Grandparents

Also, thank you so much to those of you who watched and gave feedback on the latest Page Break video. There’s a new episode up and you can check it out here!

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Book lovers!! You’re Needed!!!

So some of you know that in addition to this blog, I aim to entertain people on the internet via YouTube, but in a wildly different way.

No, it’s not porn.

It’s books.

But Cole and I are looking at sort of revamping our show a little bit and we’re looking for some serious feedback, so if any of you are book lovers (which I know so many of you are) we’d really, really, really appreciate hearing from you!

K thanks! I’ll be back to doing real posts about how weird my life is on Monday!

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Because when I get murdered, it will be adorable.

So I went out to Providence, RI yesterday for a conference and on the 2.5 hour drive back something weird happened. So, I obviously texted people about it as soon as I got home. One of those people was a friend of mine who has decided to call himself “The Professor” on this blog.

Me: I made it home. Almost got murdered, but I’m good.

The Professor: Oh gosh. You okay?

Me: Yeah. Someone was tailing me on the highway, and then they got off the highway when I did and kept tailing me, so I felt like they were maybe following me, right? And THEN I remembered this one movie I saw about some murderers who legit just picked a random car that they were driving behind and decided to follow that guy home and murder him. You know, for kicks. So I was all “This is it. This is how I die.” But then I pulled into my driveway and they kept going.

The Professor: Yeah, that is spooky… Maybe they were just marking your house…for later.

Me: Oh gosh. They’re so coming back…

The Professor: Yep. Make sure Gio is on alert.

Me: Ugh… so murder avoided… for now.

The Professor: Lol. I’m sure you’re okay. Stars Hollow is essentially crimeless.

Me: You can’t make assumptions like that, Professor. You’ve never even been here. Don’t act like you know us. We caYou're kind of cute in that  -she's (1)n murder if we want to.

The Professor: Ok fine. You are going to get murdered. Get a baseball bat. Or pepper spray. Or a gun. I was raised by republicans, I can help you with that.

Me: No thanks. I’ve decided that if someone ever really breaks into my house to murder me, I’ll just talk to them and accept my fate, whatever it may be.

The Professor: That’s very kind of you.

Me: I’ll be like “Dude, let me make you some coffee and let’s just chat this out.” … Or Gio will kill them.

The Professor: That’s kind of cute in a terrible “she’s going to die being so friendly” sort of way.

Me: That’s how I always thought I’d go…

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It’s National Coffee Day! Yaaaaaay!

Happy National Coffee Day, everyone!! 

If you’ve been following this blog for a while, you know that I have a love for coffee that surpasses most other healthy loves, which is TOTALLY A FINE THING.

http://becomingadorrable.com/2014/04/09/11-things-we-learned-from-gilmore-girls/

Coffee makes me happy. Coffee is what makes me the delightful person that everyone in my Stars Hollow has come to know and love. Without coffee, I’d be… oh god… let’s not go there.

https://www.tumblr.com/search/c:%20lorelai

Every morning, I wake up and drink about four cups of this delicious nectar before I put the rest into my TARDIS travel mug and head to work. When that’s gone I head next-door to my equivalent of Luke’s and get myself a refill. If I’m staying there for lunch, I usually get two. That can usually last me until the end of the day, but if I’m feeling silly, I’ll get myself one more just for the heck of it. They love me over there. I refuse to actually add up my receipts every month. I don’t want to know.

I know, I know, many of you are thinking that I have some sort of a “problem” or “addiction”, but really I think that you’re all just sad because I found the key to happiness and it smells delicious.

So, I invite you all to take a moment and really enjoy that brewed cup of holy water and remember how appropriate it is that this holiday is happening only two days before Gilmore Girls comes to Netflix for us all to enjoy. And yes, trust me, I will be brewing an entire pot of coffee while I marathon through that show on Wednesday. It’s likely that I’ll be live tweeting it, too, so… get ready for that.

http://thoughtcatalog.com/nico-lang/2013/08/69-fabulous-lorelai-gilmore-quotes-that-show-why-shes-the-greatest/

Enjoy your coffee, everyone, because today is a glorious, glorious day.

(Images: via, via, via, via)

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Will I Be Jailed for This?

A conversation I had last night with a friend we’ll call “Sara”, who lives in San Francisco:

Me: I’m lonely and hungry. This is terrible.

Sara: Oh nooooo. That’s the worst. Go out to a bar!

Me: …it’s 11:30 on a Wednesday in Stars Hollow.

Sara: Well… not tonight then. Unless you want to get murdered.

Me: Not the ideal alternative… or the plausible one. Again: Stars Hollow.

Me: Peanut butter!

Sara: No Nutella?

Me: I don’t do that shit. It scares me and I don’t like the voices I hear in my head when I see it.

Sara: …what?

Me: To be honest, I’ve never actually had it, but I feel like it’s the Pumpkin Spiced Latte of spreads.

Sara: LMAO – yes.

Me: I’d need UGG boots and a sorority sweatshirt when I eat it and I own none of those things.

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All the pumpkin.

Okay, first of all, this:

Okay, now that that’s out of the way…

Real post coming soon!

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